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December 6, 2011
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8 (who?)

Twenty tribes…

Twelve tribes of light…

Eight tribes of darkness…

Six realms under the sky…

The city realm.
The forest realm.
The desert realm.
The mountain realm.
The ocean realm.
And the jungle realm.

Long ago, the being above all beings named Hevan Joh created the world and, with it, created eleven tribes of light beings:

The elf tribe—master swordsmen of the forest realm.

The dwarf tribe—master craftsmen of the mountain realm.

The imp tribe—playful beings of the forest realm.

The werewolf tribe—fierce and proud warriors of the mountain realm.

The goblin tribe—ugly yet kind dwellers of the jungle realm.

The dragon tribe—magnificent, sky-born warriors of the sky realm.

The griffin tribe—wise and cunning masters of the sky realm.

The nymph tribe—caring and beautiful beings of the forest realm.

The merfolk tribe—strong and beautiful enchanters of the ocean realm.

The fairy tribe—plant spirits of the forest realm.

And the human tribe—adaptable masters of the city realm.

All eleven tribes lived in peace for a good many years. Human and elfish couples weren't uncommon and resulted in a twelfth tribe of light:

The edgedog tribe—excitable tamers of the desert realm.

A few minor fights resulted from the introduction of the edgedogs, but they were quickly resolved. And Hevan Joh was pleased with what he had created. He and the twelve tribes were one in a great circle of love, as a father would love his children. Eventually, the tribes vastly expanded until they were no longer small tribes, but entire nations with their own cultures and languages. All was wonderful in the world...

But there is a rather strange thing about wonderful times in all stories: they never seem to last long.

The twenty-six Trueborn were Hevan-Joh's oldest creations and were his envoys. The oldest and most magnificent of the twenty-six, Asake the Shining, grew jealous of his father's power and was determined to prove himself superior. Against his father's wishes, Asake created eight tribes of his own design:

The vampire tribe—cold-hearted beings of night.

The incubus tribe—vile rapists who desired women.

The succubus tribe—dark-hearted women who desired men.

The harpy tribe—wicked, winged savages.

The ghoul tribe—haunters of men who represented the dead.

The shade tribe—shadow beings who wished death to all.

The Minotaur tribe—savage, bull-headed monsters.

And the demon tribe—wicked bringers of fire and misfortune to all.

Upon the creations of these eight vile tribes, Hevan Joh cast his beloved creation out of the highest of high plains. However, Asake's rage would not be sated. He arrived at the most susceptible of all the twelve light tribes—the nearly-backwater, feudal, and agricultural Human Tribe.

He came into their midst and claimed peace and promised them much glory and power to rival Hevan Joh as well as the promise of equality. The eleven other tribes pleaded with the humans to cast him out because he created the eight dark tribes, which were causing endless wars across the other five realms. But the humans, mesmerized by Asake's promises and words, grew arrogant and simply ignored their friends' objections.

And Asake seized his chance with glee…

After spending over fifty years in the midst of the human tribe, he convinced them that the other tribes wished to destroy them and seize the city realm for their own. The humans were successfully blinded and began to hunt their fellow tribes for sport and vengeance for supposed wrongs. The elvish tribe fought with the humans. The two tribes had been close friends, but this outrage made the other ten tribes plead for the best swordsmen to fight back.

The elves agreed, but Asake was far more cunning than they had expected. He gave the humans weapons even superior than the ones they had helped create with the edgedogs. Armed with weapons of mass destruction, the humans  decimated the elf tribe until only a few remained. The remaining elves retreated into their woodland sanctuary. The other tribes stopped their trade with humans, who separated the City Realm from the others with a massive wall.

In their isolation, Asake convinced the humans that their great father did not exist. And, in time, that he did not exist. Now, the only thing that the humans remember is the hatred Asake implanted in them. However, deep in each and every one of their hearts, they do remember that there is something missing…something very important that they had cut themselves off from a long time ago.

It seemed as though the world would soon fall into chaos. The other tribes began to fight amongst themselves. Wars were caused, territory was stolen, and evil had entered every tribe. However, Hevan Joh gave the human tribe the chance to redeem itself—four hundred and fifty years after their fall, Hevan Joh created the City Heart, an object that could either purify the world or corrupt it depending upon who touched it. He knew Asake would use his influence on the human tribe to obtain it, so he sealed it away in a chamber that can only be unlocked if five ancient crystals are placed inside: the Forest Sword, the Desert Pistol, the Mountain Axe, the Jungle Bow, and the Ocean Spear.

These five crystals were hidden across the world of Theyral in the realms they were named after and would only be obtained if a group composed of at least one member of the Tribes of Light found them.

These groups, called Questers, would ride off in order to expand their group and obtain these amulets. The future of the entire world rode on the shoulders of each group that went off into the wild places of the earth. Asake would send his followers after them to bring their journeys to a halt.

Only two questers in over five hundred years have returned to the Forest alive…
The prologue of my original novel series.

Read and comment. Criticism is more than welcome.

Folder: [link]
Next chapter: [link]
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Baratus Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2011
Welp. Im hooked.
Tohokari-Steel Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2011
Well, I got the desired effect then!
Baratus Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2011
haha, yeah xD

I kept looking at it and going "ugh thats alot to read.. I'll come back to that..."
glad I did!
Tohokari-Steel Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2011
And I'm glad you did as well.
Baratus Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2011
so, is there more yet? or are you still getting to that?..
Tohokari-Steel Featured By Owner Dec 7, 2011
Oh, I've got more, you can count on that!
Baratus Featured By Owner Dec 7, 2011
oh! uhh, would it be in your gallery??
Tohokari-Steel Featured By Owner Dec 7, 2011
Wait, you meant if I had more already posted? If that's the case, the prologue's the first thing about Theyral that I've posted.
(1 Reply)
MadnessAbe Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
....Wow.....I mean, WOW!

This is really good, Steel. I mean all these combinations of supernatural tribes, in particular I like how you used the lesser known incubus and imps, and quite a large amount of religious metaphors here. I can see a lot of inspiration in here. This is practically amazing.
Tohokari-Steel Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2011
Thank you very much, Abe!
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