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Grimmwoods 5 Rough Draft

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(Gilgamesh: The following is a script created by four insects as a means to build attention for their project that I haven't even appeared in yet. They humbly request feedback, criticism, and auditions. Send a note to the poster if you desire to do the latter. Mongrels...)

NARRATOR
After a few hours passed, the train screeched to a halt. The group looked out to see a vast forest. The group began getting off as Casey Jones looked out.

CASEY JONES
Here we are! Avalon! This is as far as the tracks go. I’ll be back as often as I can, but I still have a schedule to keep.

PECOS BILL
Thanks, Casey.

AARON
(yawn) What a long ride...

NARRATOR
Arthur stared in silent awe at the towering trees of the forests of Avalon, each leaf glowing like a glistening emerald, shining in the sun for the first time since it was mined from the earth and cleaned. The jade glow from the treetops shone down on him, before he took a few steps forward, eyes wide. He could feel the magic surging from the place with each step he took... as if it was reacting to his presence. Aaron looked at the scenery with his jaw hanging low, the shine of the trees glistened off his glasses.

ARTHUR
(dreamily) Avalon...

RAPUNZEL
It’s a really pretty place.

AARON
Yeah, it is...

PECOS BILL
We've got a lot to do and not much time to do it. Better start workin’ on it now.

BJORN
Yeah, let’s get moving.

JACK THE GIANT-SLAYER
With THESE, I think we’ll be good.

NARRATOR
Jack reached into his pack and pulled out a pair of dowsing rods, which he held up with a look of pride. Everyone else gave him looks of either confusion or exasperation.

JEROME
(groan) You’ve gotta be kidding me...

JACK THE GIANT-SLAYER
(defensively) Hey, we’re looking for an underground lake, right? Well, this is how people in the desert look for water.

NARRATOR
Jack took the lead, holding the rods firmly as he held them in front of him. Rikki darted to his side, sniffing at the ground.

JACK THE GIANT-SLAYER
(smirking) Let’s see if these bad boys can't figure out where the Lady of the Lake is...

RED RIDING HOOD
(deadpan) You put a lot of faith in those sticks.

NARRATOR
Jack ignored her, looking at his dowsing rods. William, meanwhile, observed the forest, ready for danger. Red pulled out her gun, keeping it at the ready as Bjorn put a hand on the hilt of his sword. Rapunzel pulled out a map of Avalon, having taken all the maps she could when they were at the Godmothers’ house.

RAPUNZEL
Okay...so the path we're on should lead to the old lake. There has to be a clue to where the Lady of the Lake went with the sword.

RED RIDING HOOD
(unimpressed) Do you think that those stupid pieces of metal can help us find it?

JEROME
Honestly...no.

ARTHUR
I’ve heard of stranger. (teasingly) Like Beowulf’s son being a DRAGON, big guy.

BJORN
(amused) Do you REALLY want me to bring up the moronic versions of King Arthur?

AARON
(casually) Or the fact that, in our world, we learned to fly because of two bicycle salesmen using a machine made of a few planks and bike parts...without magic.

RIKKI TIKKI
(amazed) Your world sounds amazing!

RED RIDING HOOD
(shushing noise) I think I heard something.

RIKKI TIKKI
(serious voice) I’ll check it out...

NARRATOR
Rikki darted across the forest floor, silent as a cat. He silently arrived at a clearing, seeing a small army of men clad in armor, led by a man with a crown on his head and a green-skinned woman.

ELFEBA
So this was where the Lady of the Lake was at one point?

NARRATOR
The green woman waved her hand as something began shimmering around her hand. She then frowned.

ELFEBA
Hmm...no magic. Looks like she moved...likely to a place where water can be found. This lake is new...let me guess, you transferred a river here to allow fresh water for your kingdom?

NARRATOR
The green woman looked at the river with a nervous expression. This got the interest of various knights.

KNIGHT
What’s with her?

SIR KAINE
Heh, aside from the fact her skin is the color of mold and she is blind in one eye?

CONSTANTINE
(warning tone) Sir Kaine...

SIR KAINE
Just stating a fact. SO...just so we're clear, aside from the 'big guy' and the little one... (eagerly) I'm free to slaughter the rest of them, right?

NARRATOR
Elfeba scowled at this as she gave a death glare at Kaine, her good eye glowed a dark sapphire-blue.

ELFEBA
(darkly) You better watch it, metal-boy, or else you're gonna be a pile of ash before you can even blink.

SIR KAINE
(mockingly) There. I blinked. Yet, here I am.

KNIGHT
(under breath) Sensitive wench... (audibly) And to answer your question, Sir Kaine, I hear she's weak against water. I heard it killed her before she was brought back.

KNIGHT
Did she drown or something?

KNIGHT
(faint snicker) No, a child defeated her by splashing her with a bucketful.

ELFEBA
(warning growl before scoff) And aside from Beowulf and Artorius...I am sure you're free to kill the others. They're of no use to us.

NARRATOR
Sir Kaine suddenly halted. A wide smirk crossed his face.

SIR KAINE
I think I sense them!

ELFEBA
They're near by alright...might want to be careful...wait..they have some kids with them.

KNIGHT
So, this should be easy, then. A few kids is no problem, we’ll kill them with one blow.

ELFEBA
This is something I know from experience: do NOT underestimate anyone, even if they're just kids. I can take care of messing with them...

NARRATOR
Elfeba pulled out a whistle and blew it. No noise came out, but there was a loud whoosing noise as something flew overhead, casting a large shadow.

RIKKI TIKKI
(low voice) Uh oh...

NARRATOR
Rikki darted away, quickly going back to the group. When he was in earshot, he immediately shouted...

RIKKI TIKKI
GUYS, WE’VE GOT COMPANY!

RED RIDING HOOD
(concerned) Who?

NARRATOR
The group was then buffeted by a powerful windstorm. Red held her gun tightly as Rikki’s fur began to stand on end, his scarlet eyes glinting with ferocity.

RIKKI TIKKI
It looks like we’re going to find out...

AARON
That doesn’t sound good.

NARRATOR
A snarl was heard as, advancing towards them was a large beast with the front half similar to a eagle with front legs similar to talons, large wings on it's back, dark gold eyes, and a tail with a tuft of fur on the end. It send out a screech-like lion roar at the group.

RED RIDING HOOD
(intensely) A griffon. Of course...

ARTHUR
We’ve got this...I hope.

NARRATOR
Elsewhere, Elfeba put the whistle into the folds of her dress.

ELFEBA
Well, that should keep them busy. Kaine, if you want to maim them, just follow that sound and you'll find them.

NARRATOR
Kaine chuckled under his helmet before rushing forward, his armor glowing before shattering in a flurry of sparks as he darted across the water of the lake, towards the sound of the griffin. Elfeba quickly moved away from the water that came near the shore, accidentally bumping into Constantine.
The griffon snarled at this as it screeched loudly, swiping at the group as Red fired a round as Rapunzel got her whip out. Jerome was flicking his wrist, trying to get the blade out, but to no avail.

JEROME
(frustrated) Come on, come on... (growls) I think this thing is defective! It won't let the blade out!

AARON
(nervously) What are we gonna do?

PECOS BILL
Easy--don’t get eaten.

RED RIDING HOOD
Or maimed.

NARRATOR
The gryphon pounced at them, extending its talons like a bird of prey. The group scattered, evading the attack.

AARON
(terrified) Jeez, this thing’s vicious!

NARRATOR
The griffon looked at Rapunzel, screeching as it made to attack. Rapunzel snapped her whip, causing the gryphon to halt. Another crack caused it to recoil.

RAPUNZEL
(worried with some relief) Seems to be afraid of my whip...that’s a GOOD thing.

JACK THE GIANT-SLAYER
Well, it IS part-lion, so I guess lions just hate whips.

BJORN
(draws out) Yeah, (normally) biology doesn’t work that way.

ARTHUR
(concerned) Actually...I’m thinking that this thing’s the least of our problems.

JEROME
Oh sure, the giant bird-cat is the LEAST of our problems? What could be worse than that?

SIR KAINE
HOW ABOUT ME?! (maniacal laugh)

NARRATOR
Suddenly, a man carrying a wicked-looking scythe ran towards them. In a single motion, his scythe decapitated the griffon. Its truncated body crumpled, falling to the ground in a heap. Red looked shocked at this.

ARTHUR
(shocked) He decapitated that thing with one swing...

RED RIDING HOOD
(shocked) D-did he just save us?

PECOS BILL
We’re not here for trouble, sir knight. If ya leave, we won’t follow or hurt ya.

SIR KAINE
Well, I have bad news for you then, old-timer. I AM here for trouble!

NARRATOR
Standing before them was a tall, lean, pale-skinned man with long raven-black hair, streaked with crimson red highlighting, bright violet eyes, numerous dark red tattoos marking his bare chest and left arm, his right arm covered in pitch-black armor plating. And, in his hand, he wielded a  massive, primarily red-and-black scythe with a serrated, bloody blade, and a skull attached to the top of its shaft.

RAPUNZEL
(scared) Wait...I know who that is! That’s Sir Kaine, one of Constantine’s Knights!

JEROME
Clearly, he’s not above letting crazy people into his ranks...

BJORN
Right. Thank you, Captain Obvious...

RED RIDING HOOD
Rikki, aside from this psychopath, do we have anyone else to worry about?

RIKKI TIKKI
(concerned) I saw Constantine, a few other knights, and a green-skinned woman.

SIR KAINE
I just wanted your undivided attention. No fun killing you kids if you're distracted. So...who wants to die FIRST? You know what? SCREW IT! I’ll take you all out at once!

NARRATOR
Kaine swung his scythe at the group, sending out a wave of crimson energy. The team evaded, Peter and Tinkerbell flying out of the way. The wave flew through the forest, chopping down trees like they were nothing, causing the thunder of the forest falling with a cascade of panicked birds.

JEROME
(shocked and terrified) WHOA! How could a knight do THAT?

SIR KAINE
Magic, courtesy of Avalon! Hey, big guy!

NARRATOR
Kaine swung his scythe around before planting the butt on the ground. The skull at the top of the shaft was pointed straight at Bjorn before its mouth opened, sending out a torrent of flame. The reincarnated king quickly got out of the way, holding his sword as he charged, slashing at Kaine. Jerome went to join the fight, but the blade hidden in his gauntlet wouldn’t come out.

JEROME
(impatient and worried) C’mon, c’mon, c’mon!

AARON
Alright, it’s go time!

NARRATOR
Aaron pulled his wand out and gripped it tightly, he then aimed it at Kaine and thrust it out. The result...was nothing

AARON
(muttering) C'mon, this NEVER happens to Harry Potter! (aloud) Alakazam!!

NARRATOR
Unfortunately for Aaron, nothing happened, save a few small sparks out of his wand like a dying firework.

AARON
Dang it!! I-I’ll have to come up with a different plan!  

NARRATOR
Kaine, meanwhile, caught onto the trunk of a tree with his scythe’s blade and pulled himself up, dodging Bjorn’s attack. He then jumped, swinging his scythe to cleave through the tree’s trunk, sending it at the reincarnation of Beowulf. Bjorn swung his sword, cleaving through the trunk. The hunks of wood flew in different directions only to be caught by William. Rikki then charged in, giving a chatter as he jumped right at Kaine as he landed. Kaine casually switched hands and backhanded the mongoose away with his armored hand. During that second, however, Bjorn charged forward and thrust out his sword. It went right through Kaine’s back, going through his chest. Kaine looked down at the sword’s tip coming from his chest, as if the fact that he’d been impaled was a minor curiosity. He then began to cackle.

SIR KAINE
(laughing and wheezing) Not bad...not bad at all...kid...

NARRATOR
Kaine wheeled around and swung the shaft into Bjorn, knocking him away before sending out another blast of fire. This one hit the reincarnated king, sending him flying against a tree, a smoking patch on his chest.

BJORN
(yell of pain)

NARRATOR
Kaine looked at the king as the hole in his chest healed over, his tattoos glowing. Red bolted over, firing her rifle as Rikki Tikki regained himself, lunging at Kaine. Kaine casually blocked the bullets with his scythe.

SIR KAINE
A gun? REALLY? Are you THAT cowardly, GIRL?!

NARRATOR
Rikki grabbed onto Kaine’s cheek, biting down hard. Kaine grabbed the mongoose and pulled him off, tearing out a chunk of his cheek. His tattoos began glowing again, his flesh healing over. Rikki promptly spat out the chunk of flesh he tore out.

RIKKI TIKKI
(spitting) No offense, but you humans taste TERRIBLE.

NARRATOR
Rapunzel and William, meanwhile, bolted over to Bjorn. He was unconscious as the cowboy checked his pulse. It was faint, but he was alive.

PECOS BILL
Rapunzel, ya’ve got somethin’ for burns?

RAPUNZEL
Yeah, I do.

NARRATOR
Rapunzel pulled off one of the gloves she wore, revealing that on the back of her left hand was a strange-looking tattoo. On the back of the hand was a magenta tattoo of a flower with vines going to the tips of her fingers. From the looks of it, William guessed that they went all the way up her arm. She then pressed on Bjorn's chest and began to concentrate. The mark began to glow as Bjorn opened his eyes. William’s single eye widened at that.

PECOS BILL
(impressed and surprised) Yeah. That oughta do it.

NARRATOR
Kaine, meanwhile, was fighting Red, swinging his scythe while she evaded, fighting with her ax as Rikki jumped at him, only to narrowly dodge another blow from the scythe. Kaine then blocked a strike from Red before punching her away with his armored fist.

SIR KAINE
Not bad, but what’s a battle without a little blood-OOMF!

NARRATOR
Arthur had tackled Kaine, knocking the two away. Unfortunately, Kaine got up first and grabbed the reincarnated king before slamming him into a tree. He grabbed his scythe and walked over.

SIR KAINE
(impressed) THAT was a cheap shot, kid. Nicely done.

RED RIDING HOOD
No, that was a distraction.

NARRATOR
Jack had reached into the bag of tricks, pulling out a number of cherry bombs and lighting the fuses.

JACK THE GIANT-SLAYER
CATCH!

NARRATOR
Jack hurled the bombs at Kaine as the exploded with a surprising amount of force. Arthur, however, was still too close and was caught in the blast, sending the two flying. Kaine gripped his scythe as Arthur caught onto his sword. The two began fighting as they tumbled through the air.

RED RIDING HOOD
(angered) GREAT...

JACK THE GIANT-SLAYER
(groan)

NARRATOR
The two landed on the ground with a heap before quickly regaining themselves. Rikki then began running around, biting at Kaine’s feet. He quickly crawled up his chest, biting and clawing where he could. He hissed at the mad knight before jumping off, running away. Jerome saw as the blade appeared on the wrist of his gauntlet.

JEROME
(exasperated) Oh, NOW you show up?!

NARRATOR
Jerome charged at Kaine, slashing with his wrist-blade. Kaine blocked with his scythe as Aaron stayed in the background. He looked as William and Rapunzel tended to Bjorn while the others fought.

AARON
There’s gotta be...wait...PLEASE let me still have it. AHA!

NARRATOR
Aaron had found that he still had his MP3 player in his pocket. He ran at Kaine as the mad knight slashed at Jerome, who was quickly pulled away by Red. The young magician quickly grabbed Kaine around the neck and pulled him back as he set his device to full volume as he jammed one of the earbuds into the knight’s ears.

AARON
HEY, EAT THIS!

NARRATOR
Aaron suddenly pressed ‘play’. Immediately, really loud techno music began playing at full blast right into Kaine’s ears.

SIR KAINE
(yell of surprise)

RED RIDING HOOD
What’s he doing?

JACK THE GIANT-SLAYER
No idea, but it gives us a chance.

NARRATOR
Jack and Red immediately began looking over the terrain, trying to find some clue as to the residence of the Lady of the Lake. Meanwhile, Kaine’s surprised look changed into a rather dull one. He quickly spun Aaron off of his shoulders and swung his scythe across his chest, tearing it open. Aaron let out a scream of pain and held his chest as he fell to the ground. Sir Kaine held up Aaron’s MP3 player and crushed it into dust while Aaron’s blood leaked out.

SIR KAINE
(unimpressed) That was the STUPIDEST strategy I had ever seen in my life. What was your-UGH!

NARRATOR
Kaine lurched forward as the healed Bjorn had run through his gut again.

BJORN
You have a real focus problem, you know that?

NARRATOR
Rapunzel ran to Aaron to administer a healing spell as Jerome began slashing at Kaine with his blade.

SIR KAINE
And yet, YOU don’t realize my tattoos are still glowing. (shudders with delight)

NARRATOR
Kaine then pulled himself off of Hrunting before punching Bjorn with incredible strength right in the face.

SIR KAINE
(laughs) Do you kids learn ANYTHING?

NARRATOR
Bjorn took the blow and punched Kaine right back, who evaded and grabbed onto his neck, swinging him into Jerome, knocking them both to the ground before making a swipe at Peter, causing the eternal child to fly away, narrowly dodging the strike. All the while, William was looking on before glancing at his hand.

PECOS BILL
First time out...are we at that point already?

NARRATOR
Watching from a good distance were Constantine and Elfeba. The king of Camelot sighed as another energy blade leveled more trees.

CONSTANTINE
(irritated sigh) Why did I send HIM?

ELFEBA
No idea. Though I DID spy a rock formation that led to a nearby cave. Maybe that’s where it is.

CONSTANTINE
(sigh) First and foremost, I must stop Sir Kaine from destroying the forest.

ELFEBA
Fine, but I’ll go find that lake.

NARRATOR
With that, Constantine climbed onto the back of his pure-white stallion and rode towards the fight. Elphaba flicked her wrists and turned into smoke before flying away.
Back in the fight, Bjorn had gotten up, sheathing Hrunting.

BJORN
Okay, using blades is out of the picture...well, in my past life, I DID tear Grendel’s arm out with my bare hands. So, how hard could this be?

NARRATOR
It turned out that it would be very hard.
Bjorn lunged at Kaine, grabbing him in a full nelson. Kaine began spinning and thrashing around, wildly, trying to knock the reincarnated king off. Bjorn grit his teeth and held on as long as he could. Jerome went in for an attack, but was knocked aside by the struggling warriors.
Rapunzel ran over to Aaron, who was gasping heavily as he looked at his wound, close to passing out from blood loss.

RAPUNZEL
(worried) I’ve got it! I’ve got it!

NARRATOR
Rapunzel began to administer medical aid to the young magician, waving her tattooed hand across Aaron’s chest, healing it gradually and making his breathing more regular as the wound resealed itself and his blood replenished.

AARON
(sigh before sounding embarrassed) Sorry for acting so dumb… I was being careless...

RAPUNZEL
Just don’t act so impulsive.

AARON
Okay. (winces in pain) MAN, I’m never doing that again...

PECOS BILL
Smart move.

JEROME
(groan)

NARRATOR
Jerome regained consciousness near a collection of stones. He massaged his head, feeling around with his free hand. He felt something carved into it and looked over.

JEROME
What the heck?

NARRATOR
He discovered a symbol cut into one of the stones--a set of swords crossed in front of a shield. The exact same pattern on Arthur’s chest.
Meanwhile, Kaine finally hurled Bjorn off of his back, sending the Northern King tumbling. Tinkerbell flew right up to the mad knight and began flinging fistfulls of glittering light into Kaine’s eyes. She was throwing concentrated light from her fairy dust. It wouldn’t allow one to fly, but it would sting.

TINKERBELL
Dust in your eyes!

SIR KAINE
No, it is-

NARRATOR
While Kaine dodged the strike, Arthur rushed him. Kaine grinned as he let the reincarnated king hit him, head-on. He then grabbed him before hurling him into the forest.

SIR KAINE
(cackle)

NARRATOR
Kaine grabbed his scythe before following him. Arthur barely managed to draw his broadsword before Kaine was on him. The two began to clash as their fight led them towards the collection of stones where Jerome was. The other hero got to his feet and charged, not noticing as the symbol he found began to glow.
As Rapunzel finished healing Aaron, Jack and Red returned, having found nothing. Bjorn stood up, shaking his head.

BJORN
(grunt)

NARRATOR
Then, suddenly, smoke began to gather around them.

ELFEBA
(cackle) Going somewhere, my friends?

NARRATOR
The smoke solidified into the cackling form of Elfeba, the Wicked Witch of the West.

RED RIDING HOOD
(shocked) So, she IS alive after all?

AARON
(shocked) Oh my god! I-it’s the Wicked Witch!

PECOS BILL
Looks like it...

JACK THE GIANT-SLAYER
Should be the easiest fight we’ve had.

NARRATOR
Jack began rummaging through the bag of tricks as William began walking forward, hands up to show he was unarmed.

RED RIDING HOOD
What’re you doing? BOTH of you?

PECOS BILL
You two. Leave now and we won’t follow ya. We don’t HAVE to start fightin’.

NARRATOR
Jack pulled a water balloon out and tossed it up to Peter, who caught it.

JACK THE GIANT-SLAYER
NOW, PETER! SOAK THE MOLDY HAG!

PETER PAN
On it!

NARRATOR
Peter flung the water balloon past William’s head, hitting Elfeba full in the face. A sizzling noise was heard, leaving everyone shocked. The witch screamed in pain, clutching at her face. When the steam began to die down, however...

RED RIDING HOOD
(concerned) Why aren’t you melting?

NARRATOR
When the steam cleared, Elfeba was still standing. She had a burn mark on her face, but that was the worst of it. She didn’t even look pained, but rather angry. She glared at Jack as she wiped some of the water off of her face.

ELFEBA
(furious) What was that about me being a moldy hag?

JACK THE GIANT-SLAYER
(gulps; nervously) Well, uh...when I said that...y’know, I didn’t REALLY mean that. Spur of the moment deal, y’know?

PECOS BILL
Guess her resurrection gave ‘er some resistance...

AARON
If she can’t melt, how do we beat her?

RIKKI TIKKI
The old fashioned way.

Yeah, here's part 5 of the Grimmwoods script...I would just like to say that fight scenes are kinda hard to make coherent when there's about four people writing for different characters in different locations. Some parts need to be dropped and other parts need to be made from whole cloth. Also the first time we refer to the Wicked Witch of the West as "Elfeba" rather than "Elphaba". This was mainly done to avoid issues with Wicked, even though it does play a part in the lore we set up. And the debut of Sir Kaine, everyone's favorite Round Table psychopath.

:iconshadow-dj: wrote for Jerome Cooper, Red Riding Hood, Jack the Giant-Slayer, Rapunzel, Tinkerbell, Elfeba, and some knights
:iconphantos18: wrote for Aaron Hansen and some knights
:iconbrave-king-shishio: wrote for Arthur Drake, Peter Pan, Constantine, Sir Kaine, and some knights
And I wrote for Bjorn Edgetho, Pecos Bill, Rikki Tikki, and Casey Jones
(Always the chance that I missed SOME characters. I'm only human, after all.)
© 2015 - 2024 Tohokari-Steel
Comments2
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Shadow-DJ's avatar
Heh, "moldy hag". I almost forgot about that XD that will haunt Jack